Seems like nothing went right today. We are even more short staffed at work after losing another employee today, I'm still sore from surgery (shouldn't I feel fine by now), everything I tried to do at work I screwed up the first time around, hospital bills are starting to show up (I'm paying them for what exactly!!?? shouldn't I at least get an "I spent thousands of dollars at this hospital and all I got was cured and this lousy T-Shirt" T-Shirt?), my home is busting at the seams because it is chock full of breast cancer pamphlets (I am so going to have a great big bonfire when this is all over), I should have called today to make an appointment to have a port put in before I start chemo (but I didn't want to call today - so there), I've looked and looked but I can't find a funny quote to start this post with (except "cancer sucks" but tonight I don't find that funny), I really really want a diet coke, I'm scared, I've killed all my plants, I can't find half the things I am looking for, I don't feel like I have any control over anything, I miss my friends, I've started five different books and don't like any of them, there is nothing on TV tonight except The Mole and it doesn't start for hours, it was cloudy all day but hardly rained at all, I'm having trouble sleeping, I can see a picture hanging crooked across the room but I'm too tired to go fix it, commercials are stupid, and I was wrong to wait before starting chemo. I could have started this week and would have one session done with and now the waiting is going to kill me.
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OK - take a deep breath. Tomorrow will be better. It is kind of funny reading through the list how maudlin and silly I sound. Geesh - if those are the only complaints for the day that I can come up with then I have a pretty darn good life! Tomorrow I'll list all the reasons life is good!
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